30 Days of Truth / Day 6

Day 6 - Something you hope you never have to do.

I think this is a hope of all parents.  I hope I never have to bury one of my children.  NEVER.

My aunt buried a son.  He was a baby. I don't remember if he was over a year or under a year.  It was so long ago.

My sister buried a daughter.  My niece was just 13 months old.  She would be 11 years old now.

My sister is mentally challenged.  She is in her mid-thirties, but she is very much like a 15 year old teenager.  I watched her grieve in her way that she did.  She was pregnant with her son while she buried her daughter.  Sadly, 10 days after her son was born the state stepped in and took her son away.  The state reps scared her and the baby's father into signing away their rights to their son.  My nephew is being raised by his paternal grandmother and step-grandfather.  He has a myriad of medical problems.  Emotional, physical and developmental.  They live in PA- a few hours away- and yet I have never met my nephew.  I have seen pictures of him but that is it.  My sister could not have handled my nephew with all of his problems.  She just was not capable of it.  I know she rants about how everything was not fair and that she loves her son.  But I think she knows deep down she could not have cared for him and all his needs.  She could not have raised him herself.

Loss is loss.  No matter what way you look at it.  I can not imagine how she has dealt with it all.  Nor would I ever want to have to.

My sister has been dealt the shittiest cards in life.  She is not my biological sister.  She is my adopted sister.  She came into our home at 12 years of age.  In those 12 years she was abused in her biological parents' home.  She was abused in the foster care system by foster brothers. On top of all that she had her mental issues that were not fully diagnosed until she came to us.  And just when I think she has come into a *normal* home- it was not to be.  She was so scarred from her relationships in the 12 years prior to coming to our home......that she did not behave normally.  And abuse came in another form in our home. (A story I previously wrote about.)

Back to the subject at hand: Something I hope to never have to do.  And that answer was- Never have to bury a child.  I was born, had a childhood, grew to adulthood.  I got married and I am raising my kids.  My son is a young man of 19 and my daughter is moving up- she is 13.  I will watch them continually grow and have relationships and marry and have children themselves so that my husband and I can enjoy spoiling grandchildren.  We get old and we pass on. That is what I call a full circle of life.

What is your answer???